So I should be packing, but I decided to bring my blog back from the dead (it was a little too late for mouth-to-mouth to simply revive it, so I went with necromancy to fully bring it back) to announce that.....
I will be on tour for 2-4 months!!
I'll give the details later...maybe...since I need to pack and it was sudden, but I'll be singing and dancing as Sam the mail-carrier, or (I have two roles I switch off) as Oscar the Grouch and I also do some cool black-light dances as a fish and a butterly. I leave...tomorrow. I found out...today. Someone else got injured which is sad, but I get a job, which is happy and she gets to come back when she's un-injured which is also happy because Nathan and I have a 3-month rule about being apart if we get gigs. I'll be in the Midwest and on the East coast mostly, but you can check out the show schedule http://sesamestreetlive.com/tickets-0?tid[]=55
I'll be in the show until at least early November. WEEEEE!
OK, seriously time to pack.
Monday, August 17, 2009
Friday, April 10, 2009
How to curb the appetite
Are you ever tempted by food you know you shouldn't eat? Do you crave deep-fried deliciousness, have fast-food fantasies, are tortured by take-out? I have something that will cure you.......
http://thisiswhyyourefat.com/
....or make it worse, either way, it's pretty entertaining.
(Thanks to Joel for recommending the site)
Oh, and we're moving to Minnesota in less than 3 weeks. I think I'll start blogging again when I get there....
http://thisiswhyyourefat.com/
....or make it worse, either way, it's pretty entertaining.
(Thanks to Joel for recommending the site)
Oh, and we're moving to Minnesota in less than 3 weeks. I think I'll start blogging again when I get there....
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
The Gender of my Cutlery
OK so I haven't posted in forever and the reason why is....ummm....well....I just didn't feel like it.....I have no other excuse. Not that I need one since my blog readership is mostly people I Facebook with on a weekly basis anyway, but...umm...Hey look! A post!:
OK so there are certain things that are male and female. I am female. My husband is male. We know this because I am reminded of my gender every month while my husband has no such reminders-therefore he is male. Moving on to a little more advanced analysis-my family's dog is female. We know this because she never humps anyone's leg, therefore she is NOT male, and is, by process of elimination-female. I have yet to find a neuter dog-maybe in Germany.
Now we move into the abstract. Even numbers are female and odd numbers are male. This isn't a recent analysis. I've always know this since I was a child. Perhaps it was some subtle comment in my mind on male and female anatomy, but I've always known that evens are girls. OK, 7 is slightly effeminate, I'll give you that, and 77 might be female. Maybe had a gender change, I don't know, but 777 is definitely male and a masochist because he's overcompensating for 77's lack of excessive masculinity. That's just the way it is.
Now onto the non-living physical realm-my cutlery. I am torn. Spoons are definitely female and knives are definitely male, but forks? I can't make up my mind. Sometimes I think they're a spunky punk-@$$ male, but other times I think they're a sophisticated, sleek female that could run Wall-Street. And as far as sporks... they're just confused.
OK so there are certain things that are male and female. I am female. My husband is male. We know this because I am reminded of my gender every month while my husband has no such reminders-therefore he is male. Moving on to a little more advanced analysis-my family's dog is female. We know this because she never humps anyone's leg, therefore she is NOT male, and is, by process of elimination-female. I have yet to find a neuter dog-maybe in Germany.
Now we move into the abstract. Even numbers are female and odd numbers are male. This isn't a recent analysis. I've always know this since I was a child. Perhaps it was some subtle comment in my mind on male and female anatomy, but I've always known that evens are girls. OK, 7 is slightly effeminate, I'll give you that, and 77 might be female. Maybe had a gender change, I don't know, but 777 is definitely male and a masochist because he's overcompensating for 77's lack of excessive masculinity. That's just the way it is.
Now onto the non-living physical realm-my cutlery. I am torn. Spoons are definitely female and knives are definitely male, but forks? I can't make up my mind. Sometimes I think they're a spunky punk-@$$ male, but other times I think they're a sophisticated, sleek female that could run Wall-Street. And as far as sporks... they're just confused.
Monday, December 8, 2008
Twilight...wow...really? I'm posting about this?
PART I
OK so everyone else is posting about Twilight and I decided it was time that I had to do something and let the world know what I thought! Since my thoughts are so many, I must divide these posts. This post I will talk about the first book since it doesn't get me quite as angry as talking about "New Moon." So, here goes....
First off, the book was kind of boring until the last 1/5 when stuff actually happened. I was getting bored of Bella trying to find another way to describe Edward's beauty for the 300th time. I think stuff started to happen because Stephanie Meyer ran out of 1-2 syllable words in the thesaurus and decided to make a plot.
Second, there were two things Stephanie wrote about her main characters that never made sense. (1) Bella is really unique. We know this because Bella repeatedly says she is unique and different, and to be crazy-different all you have to do is read Jane Austen and listen to Debussy. (This was even before the vampire stuff.) By this definition I must have been an alien in High School because I listened to Rachmaninoff and read books.
OK, (2) Edward supposedly talks like he's from the turn of the century...again, because Bella says so even though HE NEVER SAYS ANYTHING THAT SOUNDS LIKE HE'S FROM 1918!!! Apparently Stephanie Meyer didn't want to actually research what people talked like in the early 1900's, so she just tells us he talks like this without having to go through the arduous task of writing it.
Third, Bella is a WUSS who takes love for infatuation. I'm sorry, but if people got married and stayed as obsessed about each other as Bella and Edward are, nothing would get done! You'll be too busy "smoldering" each other to remember to take out the garbage and feed the kids (especially if you're having vampire-sex all night long as they apparently do for 32 chapters in the last book.)
And fourth leads us to my biggest problem with New Moon, but is manifest in Twilight enough. It's that Edward is supposed to be perfect with a hint of "danger" AKA "bad boy," but in real life anyone who acts like he does is usually a narcissistic womanizer. I'm serious, when a guy has as much charm and good looks as Edward supposedly does, he's not going to be unaware of it and 95% of the time he's going to use it to get what he wants-and that often means manipulating women. And no, you won't be "the one" to change him.
OK, enough for now. Coming up at some point: Why the movie was better than the book and Jacob vs. Edward AKA a real man vs. an emo punk.
OK so everyone else is posting about Twilight and I decided it was time that I had to do something and let the world know what I thought! Since my thoughts are so many, I must divide these posts. This post I will talk about the first book since it doesn't get me quite as angry as talking about "New Moon." So, here goes....
First off, the book was kind of boring until the last 1/5 when stuff actually happened. I was getting bored of Bella trying to find another way to describe Edward's beauty for the 300th time. I think stuff started to happen because Stephanie Meyer ran out of 1-2 syllable words in the thesaurus and decided to make a plot.
Second, there were two things Stephanie wrote about her main characters that never made sense. (1) Bella is really unique. We know this because Bella repeatedly says she is unique and different, and to be crazy-different all you have to do is read Jane Austen and listen to Debussy. (This was even before the vampire stuff.) By this definition I must have been an alien in High School because I listened to Rachmaninoff and read books.
OK, (2) Edward supposedly talks like he's from the turn of the century...again, because Bella says so even though HE NEVER SAYS ANYTHING THAT SOUNDS LIKE HE'S FROM 1918!!! Apparently Stephanie Meyer didn't want to actually research what people talked like in the early 1900's, so she just tells us he talks like this without having to go through the arduous task of writing it.
Third, Bella is a WUSS who takes love for infatuation. I'm sorry, but if people got married and stayed as obsessed about each other as Bella and Edward are, nothing would get done! You'll be too busy "smoldering" each other to remember to take out the garbage and feed the kids (especially if you're having vampire-sex all night long as they apparently do for 32 chapters in the last book.)
And fourth leads us to my biggest problem with New Moon, but is manifest in Twilight enough. It's that Edward is supposed to be perfect with a hint of "danger" AKA "bad boy," but in real life anyone who acts like he does is usually a narcissistic womanizer. I'm serious, when a guy has as much charm and good looks as Edward supposedly does, he's not going to be unaware of it and 95% of the time he's going to use it to get what he wants-and that often means manipulating women. And no, you won't be "the one" to change him.
OK, enough for now. Coming up at some point: Why the movie was better than the book and Jacob vs. Edward AKA a real man vs. an emo punk.
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Thanksgiving cake
I'm not home now, but I just wanted to say that Nathan and I finally were reunited with the rest of our amazing wedding cake. A great family gathering is taking place and my mom and dad just flew in tonight with my mom carrying the bottom layer of our wedding cake (which weighed about 15 pounds) as her carry-on item all the way to grandma's.
Oh, and Mr. and Mrs. Lobbie were married May of 2007. The cake has been in the freezer since...
It was AWESOME! That's what you get when everything including the fondant is home-made. It also helps to have 25 relatives around to eat it. However, I'm not supposed to have white sugar and I'm...not...feeling...the greatest. I'll get back to the blogging world in a few days when I've recovered and interacted with people. I hope all of you have a wonderful Thanksgiving!
Oh, and Mr. and Mrs. Lobbie were married May of 2007. The cake has been in the freezer since...
It was AWESOME! That's what you get when everything including the fondant is home-made. It also helps to have 25 relatives around to eat it. However, I'm not supposed to have white sugar and I'm...not...feeling...the greatest. I'll get back to the blogging world in a few days when I've recovered and interacted with people. I hope all of you have a wonderful Thanksgiving!
Friday, November 21, 2008
The Miracle of Pizza and Tiny Plastic Things
So as I started writing this, I came to the realization that the humans I have interacted the most with in the past few weeks are all under 11 years old. And, as I'm sure so many of you know, we really do learn things from children that we seem to forget in our older years. I thought I'd share some jewels with you.
Don't throw your toys in the basketball hoop. How many of us, in the rush of our day-to-day lives, keep throwing stuffed animals in that spare basketball hoop as we head off to work or school, regardless of the consequences? One day we may actually want them back, but they're trapped in a hopeless net of...net until someone taller than us can get them out, and I hate being dependent on tall people.
Small, brightly-colored pieces of plastic should entertain you for hours. This lesson was learned from my dear Sunbeams. At the end of the lesson, did they want to draw pictures, run outside, or sing? No! I had given them some giant, plastic jax from our lesson and what can you do with those? EVERYTHING! You can pretend they're you're eyes, you can hide them in your blanket, you can spin them on the ground or make them attack your friends! They are so fun you'll have to put them away during class because they just ooze excitement! So really, if you have any kind of colored plastic in your home, you have no excuse to be bored.
Everything is better if you shout it. It doesn't matter what you're going to say, if you shout it, it's automatically better and funnier! Also, this is a great way to impress your peers. Remember that at your next board meeting.
Someone who can scream and chase me=friend. I used to think it was a bad thing when people I didn't know ran at me screaming. What a stuffy fool I was! Kids make friends this way! What kind of friend wouldn't run after you yelling all sorts of things? Think about it next time that homeless man attacks you-he probably just wants to play.
Eating Godfather's pizza is the most exciting event EVER (AKA Pizza Party) OK, so pizza is always somewhat exciting, but if you actually call it a pizza party......woah, I had to stop the rush of excitement that just came from writing that...then the pizza and whatever you drink tastes 50X better! And it's always best to get the most pizza, not the best pizza, so everyone can have LOTS of it! Then the fun factor is upped so high, that just sitting there is 300% more fun than chasing friends or throwing toys into basketball hoops-though these things usually follow a pizza party. Remember that for your next board meeting.
Well I hope you've been as touched as I have. I thought I'd share one more think with you that I found as I was web-searching. It looks like a literary masterpiece meant to expand the mind of kids everywhere.
Don't throw your toys in the basketball hoop. How many of us, in the rush of our day-to-day lives, keep throwing stuffed animals in that spare basketball hoop as we head off to work or school, regardless of the consequences? One day we may actually want them back, but they're trapped in a hopeless net of...net until someone taller than us can get them out, and I hate being dependent on tall people.
Small, brightly-colored pieces of plastic should entertain you for hours. This lesson was learned from my dear Sunbeams. At the end of the lesson, did they want to draw pictures, run outside, or sing? No! I had given them some giant, plastic jax from our lesson and what can you do with those? EVERYTHING! You can pretend they're you're eyes, you can hide them in your blanket, you can spin them on the ground or make them attack your friends! They are so fun you'll have to put them away during class because they just ooze excitement! So really, if you have any kind of colored plastic in your home, you have no excuse to be bored.
Everything is better if you shout it. It doesn't matter what you're going to say, if you shout it, it's automatically better and funnier! Also, this is a great way to impress your peers. Remember that at your next board meeting.
Someone who can scream and chase me=friend. I used to think it was a bad thing when people I didn't know ran at me screaming. What a stuffy fool I was! Kids make friends this way! What kind of friend wouldn't run after you yelling all sorts of things? Think about it next time that homeless man attacks you-he probably just wants to play.
Eating Godfather's pizza is the most exciting event EVER (AKA Pizza Party) OK, so pizza is always somewhat exciting, but if you actually call it a pizza party......woah, I had to stop the rush of excitement that just came from writing that...then the pizza and whatever you drink tastes 50X better! And it's always best to get the most pizza, not the best pizza, so everyone can have LOTS of it! Then the fun factor is upped so high, that just sitting there is 300% more fun than chasing friends or throwing toys into basketball hoops-though these things usually follow a pizza party. Remember that for your next board meeting.
Well I hope you've been as touched as I have. I thought I'd share one more think with you that I found as I was web-searching. It looks like a literary masterpiece meant to expand the mind of kids everywhere.
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
When You're Dead Your Vote Doesn't Count
I'm sure you're all thinking I'm going to make some reference to ACORN or reveal that I have the plague, but really I just wanted to say that according to all extreme postitions on both sides (because we know those are the most accurate), I will die or have a horrible life no matter who becomes president.
One candidate is obviously a closet-Muslim-terrorist who will support Al-Queda after he socializes us so he can spread the carnage around equally.
The other will of course die of old age and insanity tomorrow and leave us with a brainless Barbie doll who will deny the existence of dinosaurs and have a big ol' book-burning BAR-BQ in her backyard so she can keep an eye on Russia for when she starts World War III.
Obviously we're all gonna die either way, so really, does my vote count?
PS
I did vote today and was very happy about it. I just hate the extremes people go to to smear the other candidate-both of whom I respect.
One candidate is obviously a closet-Muslim-terrorist who will support Al-Queda after he socializes us so he can spread the carnage around equally.
The other will of course die of old age and insanity tomorrow and leave us with a brainless Barbie doll who will deny the existence of dinosaurs and have a big ol' book-burning BAR-BQ in her backyard so she can keep an eye on Russia for when she starts World War III.
Obviously we're all gonna die either way, so really, does my vote count?
PS
I did vote today and was very happy about it. I just hate the extremes people go to to smear the other candidate-both of whom I respect.
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